Human sexuality can be complex and somewhat confusing. Especially when you find yourself "different " from what you see around you.
For many submissive men, their feelings can cause guilt and even depression, because its hard for them to come to terms with the reality that they crave to be controlled by a powerful Woman and surrender to Her. Men are taught to be strong. To be leaders and to be competitive and successful. They are supposed to be in control.
For decades throughout history, women were perceived as the "weaker sex" and men were given the role of protector and provider.
Thankfully we've come a long way since then and even though there is still a lot of misogyny in the world, Women are no longer held back and thought of as second class citizens. But even now, somewhere in the back of their minds many men still hold on to old fashioned belief systems propagated through society and religion.
This makes it even more difficult for a submissive man to accept his yearning to be controlled. Especially if he is considered dominant in his vanilla life, at home and in his profession. Femdom porn can cause even more confusion with words such as "loser", "weak ", "cuck" and "beta" being used so often.
Being submissive isn't a weakness. Surrendering all control to a Powerful Woman can be a desire or even necessity to a man who is always in control in his vanilla life. Many of My subs have high pressured jobs or positions of authority, and being able to leave that behind even for a short time, is an extremely cathartic experience.
There are many misconceptions regarding male submissives and these are some of the more common ones.
1. All subs are losers
Words such as loser/piggy/beta etc... are trigger words that work on certain subs. It can be a kind of roleplay, and I also use such words (with consent) as a reminder that no matter WHO you may be in your every day life and how much of a position of power you may hold, once you submit to Me, I am the one with all the power and you will always be under Me.
The reality is that most genuine subs are very successful and productive in their vanilla lives. In My experience, those who I would consider actual losers are the ones who are lazy, selfish and have no goals or motivation to do anything in life. They make horrible subs because they only care about their own needs and look at Femdom as a means to jerk off to and nothing more.
2. All subs like being verbally abused.
Humiliation, whether its verbal or physical, is always with consent. Just because a man is submissive doesn't mean he wants to be abused. Many subs prefer a more gentle approach, a softer power exchange that focuses on the D/s dynamic more than abuse and degradation.
I have some subs who crave to be humiliated and abused while others desire discipline and guidance without the harsh words.
3. All subs love pain.
I come across many submissive men who have been scared to approach a Domme or explore their submissive nature because of what they see on Femdom porn. Men tied and beaten. Genitals tortured and trampled under heels and boots.
While many Dommes and subs enjoy it, there is absolutely NO compulsion that as a submissive you MUST consent to being beaten or have some kind of pain inflicted on you. Once again its about knowing your fetishes and your limits and finding a Domme who is compatible with you.
4. Submissive men must submit to ALL Women.
For many men, their awareness of being submissive started from a childhood encounter with a strict Female teacher or later through working under a Female supervisor or boss. This led to fantasies which were further encouraged through roleplays and porn.
While roleplay and fantasies are a healthy way of expressing and exploring your sexuality, when the lines between fantasy and reality get blurred it can lead to frustration, social anxiety and even depression.
If you start to feel sexually aroused every time you are in the presence of a Woman in authority it can hinder your professional performance and cause discord in every day interactions because you are basically objectifying Her without her consent.
She has been reduced to nothing more than an object of your fantasy rather than a complete person. Its VERY important to know the difference between having a healthy respect for ALL Women and submitting ONLY to a Woman who has consented to being your Domme.
5. Being submissive means you're weak.
Nothing could be further from the truth. It takes a lot of courage and self awareness to be able to accept this part of you and to place your trust in someone that you submit to. Once you find your Domme, you are entrusting Her with your mental, physical, emotional and at times financial well being, and that's not for the faint hearted!
I am always in awe of My subs and have a deep respect for the amount of trust they place in Me when they surrender themselves to Me.
Conclusion
So in conclusion, if you struggle with coming to terms with your submissive side, remember that there is no correct or incorrect way to submit. Enjoy Femdom porn for what it is, and don't let it scare you away from exploring your own submissive fetishes.
The most important thing to remember is that whatever you do should be Safe, Sane and Consensual.
Never let a Dominant or fellow sub pressure you into submitting in ways that go against your limits. There are as many different kinds of Dommes as there are subs, so don't be disheartened and keep searching until you find one who is compatible with you.